pooped

well, they did it. they failed to find someone to take over in the daycare. as of monday, i have been spending my afternoons with the 3-5 year olds. it's exhausting. the kinderclarences have all been whipped into shape, and also, there are only ten of them. the dayclarences are more than twice that number, and are besides an undisciplined, drooly, ratty bunch, who won't DO AS THEY'RE TOLD! it's exhausting.

adding to the exhaustion, the Clarence has lost his mind. he was sick all of last week, and mercifully kept home (except for that one day they tried to dupe us and drop him off anyway, and all he did was cry and cling to me), so now his routine is thrown off. he's probably still not feeling well, but i think it's more the having been sick and spoiled and at home for a week, and now being at daycare, and having (only the most necessary of) restrictions put on him. he's done nothing but tantrum for the past three days. he's at least 45 pounds, and taller than my waist, something of a two-year-old in a four-year-old's body, so his tantrums are pretty fierce. today, he head-butted me and split my lip. later, he bit me in the shoulder, hard enough to break skin through two layers of shirt. and because when he tantrums, he flings his head backwards towards the ground, all i can do is clutch him to my body to keep him from hurting himself or any of the other kids. this puts my shoulder within easy reach, and ten minutes later, he bit me again.

it's completely unsettling when someone physically harms you, intentionally. even when that someone is a toddler. and autistic. and temporarily batshit insane. so i bought myself a bag of hickory sticks.